Be Mine

Today is Valentine's Day. It's so different this year, since I'm now married and living in New York (for the time being). Surprisingly, the one difference that really comes to mind isn't because I can celebrate with my husband, but that I can't celebrate with my Dad.

No one in our house ever made a huge deal (i.e. spent lots of money) over Valentine's Day. A card from Dad for Mom and some of her favorite chocolates. A card for Dad from Mom (and probably more that I didn't know about). And Dad always had something small for the boys (and Amy last year) and I. A heart-shaped box of chocolates or a box of Reese's Pieces. Not much. But enough to make memories that make me want to cry.

I made a lot of mistakes in my teen years, probably ones most teenagers do. Attitudes of rebellion and selfishness. Pushing boundaries set for my own protection. My will clashed with my dad's many, many times. Our relationship had its rough times and almost always because of me, but despite all of this, I have a wonderful relationship with my dad. Thank God for my slow-coming maturity! (Still a process, always a process...)

My dad was my first Valentine. In so many ways I will always be his girl. My stubbornness comes from him. My love (not obsession!) of Star Wars and love (almost obsession) of Lord of the Rings started with him. And if it weren't for his constant teasing I wouldn't be able to live with my husband!

As his first child, in some ways my dad had to lay his own life down in order to be my father. My first protector. My imperfect, yet incredibly meaningful example of God the Father. Dad showed me who Christ was and was there when Christ entered my life. He showed me an example of the love my future husband should have for me, through his love for my mom.

My dad is the best dad. I love him and miss him, just wanting to get a hug.

Dad, will you be my Valentine?

(Um. Right, I'm married...well, at least one of them?)